new relationships in polyland

So our relationship took a huge turn.  We decided in order to feed our inner selves, our souls, our cravings and desires, that we, as a couple, would become a poly couple.  We did research-which is funny to think about really.  When you think you have a new identity, do you find yourself researching what that could be and mean? I do.

So we read a book, I looked at some articles. It all made sense. I wanted to be with women. I wanted to be with my husband. But it's not all about me. He needed some fun too.  And so a new relationship-after 13 years-was born.

We both started out slow, not meeting anyone. Then we both met someone and connected with them a few times. Dare I say, we hooked up too.  Then with both almost at the same time-do they know each other and is this a joke?-they fell out of our lives. Small communications, but nothing like it was the first few dates. There are no dates with them anymore.

But what worked out, is soon after we both found other people who we connected with even more.  This is so strange. Right now, after I got home from work, he got a text from his girl, and off he goes to spend some hours with her.  I kissed him goodbye and gave him a smile.  I told him to give her a kiss for me, sensually.  With this relationship, there is more to the story.  We all had some fun, and are now shared. We are a triad. Funny.

Triad. I love that he is happy and that he is getting what he needs from me and his others. I am his primary, and he is mine.  We are so happy. Why did it take so long for this to happen? Our sex live is 100x more and intense and real than it has ever been.

There is something to this happily non-monogamous thing. It really works.

Of course I wouldn't be human if there was no small pings of jealousy sometimes. But I remember that I am loved unconditionally, and that I asked for this, and that he is probably feeling the same way when I tell him I am going out on a date or to my girls house,

strange webs and fascinating worlds

I have always been Bi.  I remember back to being about 9 or 10, playing house with my friend.  I was the 'man' saying goodbye to his wife and going off to work 9the role playing stereotypes circa 1982.  We were playing at her house and as I said goodbye, leaning over her on the bed, I planted a big kiss on her lips.   We were so young and it was so fun, well for me anyway. She thought it was an accident. Me falling on her lips. Maybe it was, and maybe it wasn't. I remember thinking it was wonderful.

I didn't make note of it until many years later. Even the extra feelings I would get around girls, I just kept to myself.  I had boyfriends until after high school.  My friend came out not long after, and I was jealous. I had a boyfriend I was living with, and she was with a girl.

This friend and I later became long distance lovers for a year or more.  Being with a woman always seemed right.  But I enjoyed being with men as well,

So I guess in the context of labeling, I was, and am, bisexual.  It's not so hard right? I like men, I like women. I guess I like my cake and eat it too, so they would say. I am not confused. I am not trying to make up my mind.  I know what I want.   Is that really so hard to understand?

why is it so hard.

In my current relationship I am married. We just started a poly relationship. He has a few girls he texts and has had sex with. I have met a few girls. One of which I have had sex with.  It is just so hard to met girls.

Is it because I am middle of the road? I don't wear make up, but I wear skirts. I don't play softball, but I paddle.  I like to be on bottom with a man, and I like to be on top with a girl.

I also don't want to be a unicorn or have one in my marriage. We keep our lovers separate.   Here is the other problem.  People hear Poly, and they think we want a threesome. Open relationship then? Is that what it is called? It all seems so over thought to me.  Why does it have to be anything?  Can't I just want to be with women and my husband..and not at the same time?

things to ponder.